Friday, November 18, 2011

Sound like life to me : Healing

I will make this one short and sweet. 

We went to the Dr. for our follow up appointment yesterday at 4pm, we waited, and waited, but we didn't really feel anxious.  Finally they took a urine sample, and pricked my finger, and then we waited some more.  Finally, they pulled us back, yes, my sweet sweet husband came to the Dr. with me again, and the Dr. sat down.  He was cordial and asked how we were doing, by this point I was sweating and thinking...

GIVE ME THE STINKIN NEWS ALREADY ! Is the urine test negative? Is the blood results what you wanted to see? Do you have to draw blood or give me an ultrasound? 

This is what I heard out of the doctors mouth, he could have said something totally different but this is what was conveyed to me ...

" You're healed! 100% perfect! God created your body perfectly and he handled this without medical intervention. Your strength in each other and in your faith pulled you guys through this. This is the perfect (if there is such a thing) miscarriage with your minimal pain and how fast everything happened.  You were wise to follow your instinct and not have the procedure. I wish all my patiences had this smooth of a time physically through a miscarriage. "

Yeah he really did say some of those things! Wow ya'll ... our specific prayer request was, let the urine pregnancy test be negative and let no form of infection or complication be present and don't require any more testing i.e. ultrasound or blood work. 

BAM! Answer to prayer ... God is listening :) and all of you, our mighty family, friends, and prayer warriors helped so very very much and we wish we could hug each of you and let you know how special we felt with your love pouring down on us.

The next question was ... "okay, Doc, uhhh when can we start trying again?" He then told us we're free to start whenever we are ready emotionally and physically.  They'd like you to wait for one period so they can date the pregnancy better, but it's not required. 

Wow, leaving the office, we both had huge smiles on our faces... I even think we high fived! haha yeah, we're those people. Those people who were happy to see a negative pregnancy test (the one, and only time I hope to see that and be rejoicing) ... WE MADE IT!

Yes, it was a 4+ month set back in our plans to create Baby Barrett, but it was a victory!!! Mind you, it was very emotionally difficult and still something I NEVER desire to go through again, but God brought us through it and we were victorious!  No more moping around waiting to be back to normal ... it's time to prepare ourselves emotionally for another go round, with that, we have to be prepared for another miscarriage (yeah, that would suck).

I have spoken to a lot of women in the past week and some of them truly told me stories of physical pain and agony... my pain was severe but bareable and I am beyond grateful God allowed it that way.  We saved a lot of money and a lot of time healing from the procedure.  And I would have to say today, if we miscarry again... I will probably try to pass it naturally again and then get things tested to make sure there's not an underlying condition, but other than that, looking back on this now... there's nothing we would have changed.


We would have still rejoiced the first time we saw that positive pregnancy test...
We would have still prayed for the baby...
We would have still told friends and family who were near and dear to us before 13 weeks...
We would have still gone to the Drs. to check out the bleeding...
We would have still cried and grieved at the picture of the empty sac...
We would have still chosen to pass it naturally...
We would have still shared all of this on the blog/facebook and asked for prayers...
We would have still prayed for a painless miscarriage...
We would have still trusted in the Lord regardless of this situation...


We will still pray, and fervently ask for your prayers for a child, or two or four! That is a desire of our hearts, to be parents together, to raise a Godly family and we do not feel this set back is God taking away that desire.  He has shown us how precious life is, even when you lose it.  Mainly, he has shown us how to love and love deeply and rely on him when lifes path is unclear.

I'll leave you with this :

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."

                                                                                  - Psalm 139:13-14

God was, and is in control. He is the ultimate creator and sustainer of the universe.  He loves us and he wants what's best for us.  He created me in my mother's womb and we will hold fast to His word and pray for the day that we are blessed with a little one of our own.  Until then ... we will be filled with joy and gladness because our marriage is stronger than ever ! Our almost 3 short years of marriage has been a dream, not a day has passed that I haven't praised God for my amazing husband, and let me tell you ... passing through a difficult time with your spouse is a blessing.  It shows you what you're made of.  It confirmed to me, that I have the most amazing God, husband, family, and friends and I am so thankful to be alive.  Be blessed ya'll ...

ha ha ... so much for short and sweet :)

4 comments:

  1. Your trust in God with the situation is really inspiring! Thanks for being an example and letting Him use you. I'll keep praying for you!

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  2. Thanks so much Kristin! I hope you're enjoying married life :) Your honeymoon pictures are precious !

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  3. so happy to see this to completion with you guys. Thanks for sharing & updating! We know God is still working! love yall

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